Chets Computer Problem

Look folks, I don't know anybody named Chet, I just needed a name and Chet came up, probably because I was thinking of a vampire cat in a Christopher Moore book, actually this one! Anyway, "Chets" computer was acting up and I decided to help. The complaints:

• We can't download Microsoft Internet Explorer 9 beta
• We can't download Microsoft service pack 3 for Windows XP
• We can't turn on Microsoft Security Essentials

Man, does that sound like Waaaah! or what? Or whatnot. So, hmmm. Okay, don't download and install a beta piece of software because its a "beta" piece of software! Beta means "not done"! Clue! For those not aware, it goes like this: Alpha, Beta and then RC (release candidate). Beta is a uncooked muffin! Duh! Anyhow, all those "we can't s" add up to, you guessed it, we got trouble. The reason we can't do anything is viruses shut down Internet Explorer and that's the pipeline to the Internet. We need to fix that and the way to fix it is with SneakerNet.

This is an old method, but it works. As I see it, Internet Explorer 9 beta is out, but Internet Explorer 8 is in because it's a stable release and not "beta". First though, is Microsoft service pack 3 for Windows XP, which precedes I.E.8 and is more of a "foundation" type of thing as it fixes holes in the operating system. That software can be found here ( or search for this "xp service pack 3 stand alone", using a different, healthy computer, I downloaded Service pack 3 and put it on a thumb drive and for good measure, downloaded I.E. 8 and put that on the derive as well. I then walked over to the other computer and put the thumb drive into the USB slot and accessed the programs I downloaded. In order, I did this:

1. Installed Microsoft Service Pack 3 for XP from the thumb drive
2. Installed Internet Explorer 8 from the same thumb drive
3. After Internet Explorer 8 was installed, Microsoft Security Essentials began to work normally, so I updated and scanned with that and found over 200 assorted nasties.